After so many years of reading, doing and guiding people in personal growth exercises, my journaling methods evolved organically to include some of the most effective ones.

Whenever I’m feeling down, I know I can now quickly change my state by breaking out my journal and following these simple steps.

1. Release The Negative Emotions.

Open the floodgates. If you need to bitch, just let it rip. Write about what you’re feeling and why you’re feeling this way.

2. Focus On What You Want Instead.

After you’ve let go of the negative, it’s time to focus on the positive. What do you want instead for your life? How would you rather feel, what would you rather want to have?

3. Imagine What Wild Success Would Look Like.

Now, just let yourself dream and dream big. Think about your life 3 years in the future and imagine you’ve just had your best years yet. Write down what wild success would look like. What would your finances be like, your relationships, how would you be feeling daily, what would you be doing?

4. Remember How Great Things Already Are.

And finally, end your journaling session with a closing paragraph of gratitude. You know what you want for the future and you’re focused, now what are the dreams you’re already living and the treasures you already have?

The next time you find yourself caught up in a blue funk, simply break out your journal, a paper and pen or a new document on your PC and follow these 4 simple steps to re-energize yourself.

Photo by netjer-lelahell.

P.S. For more on positive journaling, read Christine Kane’s Gratitude Journals and Why They Work.

In a study at the University of California at Davis, Professor Robert Emmons came up with some very interesting and illuminating results from his research project on gratitude and thankfulness. Professor Emmons found that people who kept gratitude journals on a weekly basis exercised more regularly, reported fewer physical symptoms, felt better about their lives as a whole, and were more optimistic about the upcoming week compared to those who recorded hassles or neutral life events. In addition, participants who kept the journals were more likely to make progress towards their personal goals in life.

The study also notes that people with a strong disposition toward gratitude have the capacity to be empathic and to take the perspective of others. Grateful individuals place less importance on material goods; they are less likely to judge their own and others success in terms of possessions accumulated; they are less envious of wealthy persons; and are more likely to share their possessions with others relative to less grateful persons.

If the practice of gratitude is so beneficial to our overall well-being, how can we learn to cultivate it more? My gut feeling is that the type of gratitude we normally experience when we see others that are less fortunate than ourselves is not enough. If it were, we would all be much happier as we are surrounded by evidence of the suffering of so many people in the world today. It seems that we need to look directly at our own lives in order to be truly grateful and thereby reap the benefits of gratitude.

The concept of gratitude is directly related to the idea of the power of positive thinking. Concentrating on what we do have versus what we don’t have seems to be the key. Reminding ourselves on a daily basis of all the things that come our way keeps us grounded in gratitude instead of want. At any given moment during the day we can stop in the moment and be thankful. Keeping a record of these moments, journaling, is what Professor Emmons recommends. When life becomes overwhelming we can look back at our musings and see just how lucky we really are.

Indeed, further results of the University of California’s study show that a daily gratitude intervention (self-guided exercises) with young adults resulted in higher reported levels of the positive states of alertness, enthusiasm, determination, attentiveness and energy compared to a focus on hassles or a downward social comparison (ways in which participants thought they were better off than others). There was no difference in levels of unpleasant emotions reported in the three groups.

As we are told not to sweat the small things so too can we be very grateful for the little joys in our lives. I just got back from running to school to drop-off something for my daughter. Upon entering the house, which is warm and toasty compared to the rainy, cold day outside, I was greeted by my three dogs with tons of kisses and love. They now lie by my feet as I type away. The house is peaceful and quiet like my own personal sanctuary. I glance out my windows and see nothing but the foliage that envelops my home. These are the little moments that that we can become attuned to in gratitude. There are hundreds of such moments in any given week if we are mindful of them. They add up and build upon one another to create a more centered, content and positive perspective on life.

Furthermore, the research reports that grateful people do not deny or ignore the negative aspects of life. Again, my intuition tells me that given the perspective that gratitude gifts us, we are undoubtedly more equipped to handle life’s challenges. One’s attitude can determine how effective one is in coping with what life throws in our direction. Our perspective on life determines our reality. If we approach things with a perspective grounded in say the belief that life is unfair, everything that turns up will look unfair. But as we practice gratitude, we are endowed with its gifts of optimism and the necessary energy required to take on our lives.

How can you start to practice gratitude? Begin with the art of mindfulness, being totally present in the moment. Notice all the little things that surround you, things you might take for granted if you hadn’t stopped to really look. Offer acknowledgment of these small gifts much like my moment in a warm and peaceful home with my dogs. Write them down in a gratitude journal. The little things make up the fabric of our days, our months, and our years. Oftentimes we hardly notice them because we are so caught up in the task of living. As they say, stop and smell the roses.

Stop and consider what you have been given in life. Are you blessed with financial security? Do you have loving children, a supportive family? A nice home? Are you in good health? Do you enjoy your work? Do you have wonderful friends? What does nature give to you? Do you have a supportive and loving mate? Concentrate on what you do have and not what you lack.

Research also tells us that the act of giving back to the world has much the same effect as gratitude. Interestingly enough, Emmons study also found that participants in the daily gratitude condition were more likely to report having helped someone with a personal problem or having offered emotional support to another. The act of gratitude and the act of giving back therefore reinforce each other and lead to the inevitable; more fulfilling, meaningful and happy lives.

These are things that we all know to be true in the abstract and yet we can take them from the abstract into the specifics of our own existence. Start practicing gratitude today. Pull out a notebook and write down just one thing. Commit to adding to this journal everyday. A good time might be before bedtime when you have time to reflect back on your day. Think of all the good things that occurred. Perhaps a brief but meaningful exchange with a child or a friend. Maybe a great cup of coffee. When you put down your pen and paper, you might just go to sleep easier. That’s yet something else for which to be grateful.

Life Coaching is a proven, powerful, one-on-one professional relationship that can help you to achieve your goals and lead a more fulfilling and happy life. Learn how to create positive change in your life.

Shelley Stile is a professional Life Coach having trained with CTI, the Coaches Training Institute. She is also a member of the International Speaker’s Forum as well as an instructor at the Adult School of Montclair, NJ and a workshop leader at the Center for Women in Livingston, New Jersey. She works with individuals in a one-on-one relationship to guide them towards the life they want, especially during times of transition.

Visit www.changecoachshelley.com and take a free customized Life Quiz and sign up for weekly coaching tips. Contact Shelley Stile at shelleystile@changecoachshelley.com today for a complimentary sample session of coaching!

I came across the idea of magical moments some time ago. We all have magical moments in our lives, that’s undoubtable. The question is really, do we notice them, and how much of them do we remember? Paiboon makes a great point for capturing down our magical moments, so I won’t repeat myself here, and he does have the the warmest smile I’ve ever seen from anybody so there must be something to it

If you haven’t read My Treasure Box yet, go devour it now before you come back and continue reading!

It’s been documented that people who lead healthier and longer lives are, surprise suprise, more positive in their attitudes. And one of the keys to their positivity is that they tend to remember more of the good times they’ve had than the bad.

Looking back on these last 7 days, it’s been a real trip. I can’t imagine, for example, that it was just 5 days ago on Day 3 that I was involved in a traffic accident, restraining someone to wait for the ambulance! But the act of capturing it down has helped me to remember, and given a place for me to review it.

And the most obvious thing about the last 7 days that’s been all the same is; the things I’ve been most grateful more weren’t things; it was people. The people I love and who love me make my life rich beyond any of the material things that I’m have (which I’m grateful for too), and I am so so grateful to have them in my life.

The challenge has been a good experience for me. For those who’ve been following me through these last 7 days, what’s been your experience? What have you learnt and gained from these last 7 Days of Gratitude?

We went to the Esplanade roof-top, a cultural building just besides the river. And as we both laid there on the wooden floor, just lazing and gazing up at the sky, he said; ‘how often do you get to just lie here on a monday afternoon on the roof of the Esplanade, watching the sky and looking at planes flying overhead leaving little cloud trails in their wake?’

And it was true, it was only because of the craziest of coincidences that we’d both decided to leave our jobs and be freelancers that we could be there at that moment enjoying each other’s company. Not to mention the years of jokes, poking fun at each other, hardships and heart-to-heart talks that we’ve seen each other through that’s built our friendship to the level it is now.

I’m really grateful to have him in my life, and to enjoy his friendship still after all these years. In fact, my polytechnic friends are amongst the best I have and I’m so grateful for them all.

Which are the moments in your life that you get to spend with your favorite people that you’re most grateful for?

P.S. After (much) hinting from Stuart, I’d like to announce that (ahem cough cough) I’m grateful to him as well (ahem ahem cough).

Just kidding!

In fact, thanks Stuart for the invite to your Internet Marketing seminars. It’s been a blast and I really appreciate it.

Yesterday was an interesting day. I got to make a new friend recently and last night we went out for the first time. It was a new opportunity to make a friend and I’m really grateful for that, especially since one of my goals this year is to widen my social circle.

Yay, goal accomplishing!

What about you? What’s one goal or direction in your life that you’re grateful to have accomplished?

It was my friend Gabriel’s birthday earlier this week, and I met him today for some coffee and to pass him his birthday gift (one of my favorite books; Veronika Decides to Die). We had a nice chat, had dinner with his girlfriend and friends, and decided to go play LAN games afterwards (DOTA Allstars on Frozen Throne, one of my all-time favorites!).

It was a really special moment because Gabriel is one of the 2 longest standing friends I have. I’ve known him since I was 12, and that makes for 15 years of friendship now (wow! even I’m surprised). That’s a long time. Even though we haven’t always kept in touch, we’ve remained easy friends. His friendship is something I value, and the fact that we’ve made it thus far, and seen each other through so many changes, not to mention the fact that I wouldn’t have had my last girlfriend if he hadn’t introduced her to me, is something I am immensely grateful for.

What’s one thing you’re grateful for in your life today? Even if you don’t write it down in our comments section (which I do recommend you do), do take a moment to think about it…