Walker, there is no path. The path is made by walking.
~ Antonio Machado
Sometimes, the benefit of having walked the rocky path is being able to help someone else avoid one.
My youngest brother’s just graduated from secondary school, and is choosing the next path to take in his life. Will he follow the path of his earlier 2 brothers and chose to study design, or will he take a different path? My other brother and I just spent the last 2 hours giving him advice and sharing our experiences.
It’s 12:44 in the morning, I’m tired, starting to have a headache and have to wake up early for work tomorrow, but it was worth it.
In telling our stories, I realized both my brother and I have made our choices in life, and not all of them have been perfect choices. That’s human after all. I told my youngest brother that he could take our advice or not, but in the end to remember that there are never any guarantees. He could follow our advice to the letter, but that doesn’t guarantee success. He could also disregard everything we said, but that doesn’t guarantee failure.
He has to make his own choices, because he’s the one who has to live through those choices.
Good advice I could have used about 12 years ago myself, I think
I think a lot of us like to imagine about other people’s perfect lives. About how picture-perfect, clean, well-mapped, spotlessly successful and all-around shiny somebody’s life is.
But the truth is that life is messy. Our paths resemble zig-zags more than straight lines. Moods come in seasons and have more than one flavor. Sometimes we bust our butts and we still don’t get what we want. Life can be tough.
The more we can accept that there are no perfect people the easier it will be for us to accept our own imperfections – yes, we will screw up, yes, there will be times we do outrageously stupid things. But forgive, learn and move on. Move on.
Allow for periods of down-time. Allow for times of not-knowing. Allow for not being productive, Zen or empowered. Allow for times of not being perfect, just being human and doing the best you can do to just take that next step.
To be honest, I’m tired. My life has been a winding one and I haven’t reached the level I thought I would when I started out. There are times I wonder outright how I could have the audacity to share with others how to create a greater life for themselves – when I should be working on me! Walk the talk, then lead the way.
(Not to say that my life isn’t good, in fact I’m very grateful for the immense blessings already in my life. I just want things to be much better.)
It’s this fear of being found out for not being perfect, for not having the credentials behind my name, that’s caused me so many doubts. But I feel it’s time to leave those fears behind, and just tell you; hey, I’m human, and I’m not perfect. If you think that’s nonsense, I’m sorry. If you don’t, well, I hope you find something of value here.
And I’m confused. I wonder if Life Coaches Blog would ever take off. Right now I’m feeling like it can’t. I’m doing it because there are still things I want to share, a legacy I want to build, so that if I ever leave it I would leave it proud. I’m working on another project but it’s taking the darnest to get off the ground.
I take it being tired, scared and confused are not good things for a personal development blogger should admit to. But I’m telling you now, I feel them just like you do. So perhaps that’s how I know your path – and how we can all help each other walk it – because we’re all on the same one.