When was the last time you decide that you have to change something about or around you? How did you decide to change?
There were something that you decided at a certain point that you want to do more of, to have less of, to move away from, to go towards to…you decided that you deserve more, you are going to stay away from…you are sick of it, you are tired, fed up, irritated, frustrated, peeved, and what else not!?
You feel it deep in your bones, the voices are calling out to you and the lights seem brighter at the other end. Your whole being is telling you that you have to shape up or ship out!
You keep your chin straight and eyes shining with pride that YES!! You have decided that you are going to be a new creature; you are leaving the old shell behind. Oh wow!! You are so ready to make the Quantum Leap. It’s like you are a water-dweller deciding that you can breathe on land and take the resource available on the bank. Hey! A significant moment in Evolution!!
The edge of a panic called Fear starts to gnaw at the edge of your consciousness. It starts at the pit of your stomach and starts grinding towards your chest. You call upon Murphy’s Law: Everything that can; will go wrong! Hey! Should you stick your head out so far? Maybe the luscious leaves doesn’t really taste that good after all (even if you know that the arching branches over the pond with loads of them occasionally taste really good). The pond is getting really overcrowded.
The plants on the bank beckon.
You jostle amongst the common pond-dweller and scream: you gotta be made for greater destiny!! Darn!! The watchamacallits are at it again, scooping everything up young shoots, roots and all, don’t they know they have to leave the roots so that you’ll have new weed for the next season?
The plants on the bank beckon once more.
You deserve more! You can do more! You don’t have to take all that shit (yeah that one floating by) You breathe the dry air breaking surface of the water, better that than risk getting shit inside your mouth, right? It’s not what you are used to: your lung burns. May take some getting used to. Lung is still burning but you are alive and your other senses start tingling. Things look different, smell different, though the air is more bearable.
You can’t decide if the whoozy dizziness is the result of breathing in a new way, seeing in a different light or just plain hunger.
A new food source beckons.
Darn and double darn! YOU WON’T WANNA STRETCH THAT FAR!! You pop your head back in and gulped a mouthful of the murky liquid. Such a familiar stink to it. And “what’s that taste in the mouth?” and begin to wonder where that piece of shit float to.
You declare to Destiny:
“This is MY Comfort Zone, darn if I wanna move out of it when I found a new food source and frankly, I’ll sooner leave evolution stuff to others and I’ll hang around others who are full of shit!!”
Note:
1) I have often wondered how people refuse to move out their “Comfort Zone” when they are uncomfortable in them.
2) People always hide behind the lame “I can’t change” when it is really “I won’t change”!
3) Stretch, because people can be more.
4) Yes, I actually used this little piece as a provocative intervention during one of my coaching sessions. As you may have observed, I left most of the expletives out.
January 13th, 2006 at 11:30 am
Haha funny fun and still so relevant. You have more than a knack that’s not just a gift for these things.
January 16th, 2006 at 3:22 am
I’m just curious about this comfort zone thing. What if u r not sure exactly which way to go? Do u stretch blindly in hopes that you get somewhere?
January 16th, 2006 at 5:47 am
You just have to strectch to the direction you want to you. Check out Alvin ’sPost on Stretch.
Set a goal that excite and scare you at the same time. Do stretching in particular area that allow you to grow closer to your goals.
January 17th, 2006 at 1:11 am
Well if you are not sure EXACTLY where to go. I’m sure you have some idea about the DIRECTION you WANT to go. If you are saying that you are still not sure. Well there you have it, it’s time for you to stretch yourself and rediscover you.
Hence it will not be a “blind stretch”, coz all stretches comes from a certain reference point to go towards another point thereby resulting in a stretch, right?
All change is a result of discontent with the present. Your comfort zone may just be a representation of same old shit that you are already used to. If you stay the same, the discomfort will catch up or manifest itself in another form. Think of the time when you say, “I thought I’m already used to being pushed around until…..”
Take a stretch, coz if you aim for a Y2K miss it by a whisker, you may just land yourself with a Ducati.
January 17th, 2006 at 1:28 am
I’ve always thought that people stayed in their comfort zone cause they were so comfortable and used to it. If a person is discontented, would’t the person naturally want to get out of their comfort zone?
It would be a struggle between being unhappy and discontented versus staying where you are and being comfortable with your surroundings that determine whether change takes place?
January 17th, 2006 at 2:18 am
Yes I agree. We see that a lot with the work we do with people.
I’ll be dealing with Change in my next post.
January 18th, 2006 at 2:14 pm
Jes, you can go back to the old pain and pleasure model, it’s the one that I’ve found makes the most sense and is the easiest way to explain secondary gain.
People can want to change but if they attach more pain to it and more pleasure if they stay the same they won’t want to.
The thing is that pain and pleasure aren’t always immediately obvious.
A person who wants to quit smoking, for example, might want to because he feels afraid of the potential health problems (pain). But unconsciously he might smoke to help him relax (pleasure) and it outweighs the pain he currently feels.
That’s an example of secondary gain.
But it really all depends on what you attach meaning to. Some people get a kick out of moving out of comfort zones all the time…they’ve taught themselves that the eventual pleasure of the change they make far outweighs any present pain they might experience.
An athelete like yourself would understand
January 19th, 2006 at 3:22 am
Thanks for the analogy. I think i see things better when u give me a specific example. So i guess if u have no inclination to move anywhere, then u just stay the way u are. Ha
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