Thinking Negative
David Seah has a hilarious post over at his blog, ‘Thinking Negative’ that’s giving me some ideas on how to write my future posts:
“No no no, that’s not how it works.” the ghost said impatiently. “If you’d had any real talent, it would have manifested itself—at the latest—by your 21st birthday. Too bad you didn’t do more work in high school and college…that might have made up for your dearth of talent, and you could have gone to a really good grad school. Then you might have had a shot. But no…I want to find my passion…” The ghost minced around in a circle, hands waving in mock panic. “I need to know my purpose in life! I’m a maverick! I’m a lone wolf!”
Funny! And there’s a reason David starts to feel better after being ribbed by his Ghost of Talentlessness. Intentionally or not, he used a technique often employed in coaching. You take a limiting statement by the client and take it to its extreme logical limit;
Client: Aw shucks, I’ll never meet anyone I like.
Coach: Wow, you’re going to hate every single person you meet until you die?
instead of meeting the belief at its limiting level, you stretch it logically until it becomes so ridiculous its logic fails (for the NLPers, ‘threshold blowout’), and the belief gets weakened or even thrashed, with good humour too!
Before you go ‘Whee! Another useful tip to play with’, what do you need first to use this with your friends, family, clients, or tall, beautiful strangers? That’s right, rapport.
Only someone who trusts that you’re being ludicrous to help them feel better and not to belittle or insult them will let you get away with this. Remember, it’s only a joke when someone else also finds it funny!
What is this animal called rapport exactly? That’s another topic in itself, and there are some common misunderstandings about it that I’ll write about in my next post.
P.S. Interested to find out more about the unconscious structure of creating effective threshold blowouts using humour and rapport? Short of being coached by us, the book Provocative Therapy is where I first learnt what it was I was doing without knowing about it, and how to do it even more elegantly.
HI Alvin,
Thank you for posting those links online, i really really appreciated it. Like what other use to say, “you will never appreciate certain thing till you lose it”. I guess i took it for granted that these links will always be around. Haha. Well, i am going to bookmark them NOW! Once again, thank you, Alvin, for posting them here. Cheers
Thank God you told them that I said “fuck”. i always worry that people come to my blog through links and end up terrified upon arrival.
Thanks for the mention and the introduction to your very sexy looking blog.
You’re welcome guys
Hey Alvin
Wow, very cool new site! I thought I went to the wrong blog at first. What a nice surprise after a break from visiting your site again.
I’m back again! haha
Great resource. Thanks. I’m a big fan of personal development and productivity. I’ve just bought Zen to Done. Great reading. I’m into it for the second time and implement it one habit at a time.
Sometimes it takes tough love to get over your problems. I found an enlightening option of this sort through Dr. Larry Winkle. He has recently started a blog. It is definately worth looking over.
Ooops, I forgot to post the link. http://drlarrywinkle.blogspot.com/
Welcome to the new Life Coaches Blog, Kloudiia!
Wonderful links! Thank you!
We have just published our second research report on whakate.com listing a huge number of related blogs personal development and productivity.
hi friends,
do have a look at http://lifeofexcellence.com/blog
this is full of fresh and original personal development ideas..